There are so many articles giving us advice on how to avoid stress, but let's face it, it's pretty much impossible. People ask me ALL the time, "How do you do it? How do you not get stressed out?" The answer? I DO. I'm human, and just like everyone else, I feel the pressure of stress. In my opinion, it's impossible to never get stressed out. I think what really makes the difference is HOW you handle the stress. It's so easy to just throw your hands up in the air and whine and complain about how life isn't fair and you have an incredible amount of things on your plate and no time to do it (yeah, I've been there before.) So if you have to do that, then do it, but after you're done you have to do something about it. Just like weight loss or any other goal in our lives, complaining doesn't get us far. It's action that really makes the difference.
So if after you've read all those articles about how to not be stressed out you still somehow magically happen to succumb to stress anyway (impossible not to, seriously,) here are some tips to help you get back on track and get what you need to get done, DONE.
1. Take a breath. I know I often find myself running through the list of things I have to do and I literally start breathing heavy. I freak out inside, and the next thing I know I'm either crying, screaming, or whining to someone about my problems. Truth is, none of that will help (although crying sometimes makes me feel a little better.) So, after I get it out of my system, I sit down, take a deep breath, and try to ignore the big picture and focus on all the little steps I need to take to accomplish my tasks. In my opinion, this is the hardest step, because calming yourself down in a moment of pure freak out is a difficult task. So when it's time for you to start taking action, literally sit down in a chair or on your couch and just breathe. Focus on your breaths (yoga style) and let your mind relax. Focus on how your breath sounds and feels and now on what you have to do. Do this for about five minutes, and then open your eyes, take one final deep breath, and get started. A relaxed, calmed mind is going to function better than one that's frazzled. So don't shove your head in a computer, just breathe.
2. Make a To-Do List. This is not an easy step either because you have to prioritize. I usually use my planner to make my lists so I can appropriate what I have to do with the day I have to do it. But you can also just make a running list and put the "due date" in a separate column. Be careful how you organize your list, the last thing you want to do is get to Thursday and realize that something that was due Wednesday still isn't crossed off. Making the list will not only help you organize when you need to do what, but it should also help you feel a little better. Seeing everything written out on paper usually makes it seem smaller than when it's circling inside of your head. Also, there's nothing like the feeling of crossing an item off the list. The smaller it gets, the less stressed you'll feel.
3. Resist temptations. You're more than welcome to take a study break and take a walk or lay down on your bed and just relax for a little while, but you have to be wary of the temptations that can lead you off course. For instance, avoid Facebook and Pinterest (if your task doesn't involve using a computer, stay off it. If it does, change your passwords or log out so that it's more work to get to those sites.) Also, you're almost guaranteed to have friends around you who don't have as much to do and want you to go out at night or join them for some sort of event, but it's important to stay focused. I've been there before and I've had times when I made the wrong decision. What ends up happening? The entire time I'm out or on Facebook I think about everything I should be doing and that starts to raise my stress level. Then, when I finally do get back on track, I realize how far I set myself back and the stress increases more. So basically, I have to restart at step one, and sometimes there's not even time for that. The key is to stay focused and realize that if you can get through your list, the reward of relaxation will be better than those temptations can offer.
4. Call Mom or Dad. It seems ridiculous, right? You're a grown adult, why should you call them? Well, the truth is, the older people in our lives have been through this crap and they are the ones who can make us realize how small our problems really are. If your mom and dad aren't in your lives, try your boss, grandparents, or anyone else you're close with who isn't in the same generation. What happens when you complain to your friends? They probably shift the focus to them and tell you everything THEY have to do, or worse, tell you that they don't know what you're going to do and give you a simple, "Man, that sucks." But, if you tell your mom, dad, or another elder, they're more likely to help you calm down and see the big picture. They will reinforce the "take it one step at a time" notion and sometimes they even have helpful hints for some of the tasks you have. Overall, it's a safe bet, and on top of that, it's a comforting step that will help ease your stress. It's crazy what the voice of a loved one can do for a stressed soul!
5. Reward yourself. When you cross something off your list, reward yourself with a small something. It may be a dessert you love, reading a chapter of a book you're in the middle of, or catching up on a show. Even though you have a lot to do, your brain needs rest between tasks. If you do five homework assignments and then try to move straight into studying for a test while simultaneously doing your laundry, cooking dinner, and planning a social event - your brain is going to go into overload and most likely shut down. How many times have you been in the middle of studying and realized you aren't remembering anything? Or maybe you're doing a homework assignment and then realize you're doing it all wrong? It's a terrible feeling, and one way to avoid it is to let your brain relax before moving it to the next item on the list. Plus, it helps keep your stress level down if you're happy and content as opposed to freaking out.
6. Wake up early instead of staying up late. I really hate this one, but it is such great advice. I'm a night person, so I used to choose the option of pulling an all-nighter to get things done. Unfortunately, most of my work I did during these all-nighters was C quality at best. The best option is to go to sleep at a decent time and wake up early to start on your tasks. Even if you work in the morning, waking up a few hours before you have to leave will give you ample time to get things done. Your brain will feel rested and ready to face new challenges and your body will be more relaxed, too. By the end of the day, your body is tense from the day's activities. But in the morning, it's freshly rested and ready to take on the world. If you're a night person like me, try it. I promise it will yield amazing results!
7. Avoid the stimulants. Maybe it's because I'm in college, but I can't even count how many of my friends I've seen wait until the last minute, stress out, and then take Adderall to try to get everything finished. Not only is this terrible for your body, but most of the time it has adverse effects. I had one friend take it, stay up all night studying, and then she ended up falling asleep an hour before her exam and missing it all together. I had another friend take it and then she got on Facebook for a minute and the next thing she knew it was three hours until her exam and she hadn't even written a notecard. Almost all my friends who have taken it feel exhausted the next day and can't enjoy the time after their task is over, which should be the time they feel most relaxed and happy. Overall, it's a bad choice. I know I know, I sound like a PSA right now, but in my opinion, it's just not worth the risk. If you absolutely HAVE to pull an all-nighter to get things done, I suggest a more natural approach, like taking B-12 vitamins or even the 5 Hour Energy shot. It's not the best method, but it's the least harmful in my opinion.
8. If after all of this you still feel crazy stressed and can't shake it, my last bit of advice is to just let it out. Sometimes the stress we're under is unlike any we've experienced before and taking these simple steps just isn't enough. In those times, it's better to just let it out. Cry, scream, write it down, tell a friend, whatever you have to do. Not only does this let you release the tension, but usually after this, you realize that the only thing to do is take action. Sometimes it takes this step before you can start with step one. So don't be ashamed and don't think you're being irrational or that you're the only one. Just let it all out, and then get to work.
Overall, stress is an unavoidable hassle and we all have some sort of stress in our lives. My hopes for you are that they remain small and manageable. My mom always tells me that I'll never be handed more than I can handle. There have been times when I've refuted this, argued it to no end, thrown my hands in the air and threatened to give up. But eventually, I see the light at the end of the tunnel, I reach my goal, and the stress disappears. I'm not saying it's easy, because nothing in life worth anything ever is. But my point is, in the end, action is what makes the difference, and if it's a goal worth stressing over, it's a goal worth pursuing - and the reward will be worth the work.
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